It does vary a little, it's true.
As a rule of thumb, I've found ball joints don't need any clearance to fit, as long as there's plenty of airflow in the channel (if the joint is designed to go through a range of motion, say, 90 degrees, then the room needed to account for the shaft's movement allows air in the socket to escape when the ball is pushed in). If the ball is the same shape as the opening (most of my neck joints, for instance, are only designed to rotate and rock a little, so the opening has a 4mm diameter like most of the balls), then a little clearance needs to be allowed for.
I've used tabs, like on Vantage's shoulders above, to hold parts together temporarily (in my case, as I said, it's to hold them together when the figure is in one form or the other). Most of these tabs are about 1mm x 2mm, and 1mm high; in these cases I've allowed the 0.1mm gap all round.
Then there are the 'snap' hinges (like
Salvo's gun barrel), which consist of a cylindrical pivot (generally around 3-5mm diameter) which snaps into a socket via a pair of nubs on either end. I've found these need a little more clearance to allow movement, and I've stretched it to 0.2mm either end, except at the tips of the nubs themselves, which I give no clearance for friction.
Hope that's helpful.
Andy